Daniel Pink

Positive emotions are essential, of course. We’d be lost without them. It’s important to look on the bright side, to think cheerful thoughts, to detect light in darkness. Optimism is associated with better physical health. Emotions like joy, gratitude, and hope significantly boost our well-being

Too much negative emotion, of course, is debilitating. But too little is also destructive. A partner takes advantage of us again and again; that snake sinks its teeth into our leg.

Nearly all regrets fall into four core categories—foundation regrets, boldness regrets, moral regrets, and connection regrets.

most children don’t begin to understand regret until age six. But by age eight, they develop the ability even to anticipate regret. And by adolescence, the thinking skills necessary to experience regret have fully emerged. Regret is a marker of a healthy, maturing mind.

The athletes who finished third appeared significantly happier than those who finished second.

Counterfactuals can point in either of two directions—down or up.

With upward counterfactuals, we imagine how things could have gone better. They make us say “If only . . .”

“downward counterfactuals,” we contemplate how an alternative could have been worse. They prompt us to say “At least . . .”

At Leasts deliver comfort and consolation.
If Onlys, by contrast, make us feel worse.

If Only counterfactuals degrade our feelings now, but—and this is key—they can improve our lives later.