Christmas Shopaholic

It was all the stallholder’s fault for having such a nice face. He lured me into buying his stupid cushions and a leather elephant.

“Well, look…couldn’t we do all this online?” suggests Luke. “If we sit down together with a laptop, we could blast through it. Or give me a task. I’ll order decorations. Take me five minutes.”

Luke? Order decorations? Is he mad? Last time he ordered tree ornaments, he got six vile purple baubles and then, when I complained, he said, “Well, I think they look nice.”

“No, it’s OK,” I say swiftly. “I need to see them properly, in a shop. And, anyway, we need to support the British high street.”

“Well, couldn’t you go somewhere closer than Selfridges?”

“I don’t mind.” I give a slightly martyred sigh. “Someone’s got to put the effort in. See you later.”

fling my arms around her.

pops out to the hal

I’ve passed around a selection of canapés,

withdraw from Christmas

shows us into the sitting room.

You don’t know what he gets up to.”

are you nuts

Better safe than sorry

Doesn’t ring a bell