Zodiac Academy 9: Restless Stars

“Never better, bootiful – bewtiful – bluetiful,” he laughed, staggering sideways and crashing into Darius.

“Awoooo.” Tory raised her hands in the air, cupping Darius’s cheeks. “Look, it’s a full moon.”

“Your dead dad has been giving my dead mom the eyes apparently,” Max muttered icily, glaring at Orion as if it was his fault.

“Really?” Orion asked curiously, but Max’s eyes simmered with anger.

“She’s waiting for my dad,” Max growled. “Tell your dead father to back the fuck up.”

“Sure, I’ll just light a scented candle and whisper my wishes into the flames as soon as I locate my aromatherapy set,” Orion deadpanned, and Max’s scowl grew.

“Well you’d better do something about it,” he muttered.

“It looks like you have a fan club,” I said, laughing as I showed him the artwork. “There you are in a barn lounging on a haybale - with your dick out. Oh and there you are climbing an apple tree – with your dick out. And, oh look, this one has immortalised that time you rode bareback on a horse through that cornfield. With your dick out.”

Orion gave me that stern teacher look like I was somehow responsible for the porno art, and I only laughed harder.