Introduction
People you can’t stand: they’re those difficult people who are either not doing things you want them to do or doing things you do not want them to do—and you don’t know what to do about them. Well, you don’t have to be their victim anymore! While you can’t change difficult people, you can communicate with them in such a way that they change themselves. It’s a matter of knowing how to get through to them when they’re behaving badly.
This book will help you to identify and assemble elements of effective communication. In that sense, communication with problem people is similar to making a phone call. You have to dial all the numbers in the correct order if you want to get through. Leave out just one digit (only 10 percent of the whole number if you include the area code), and your call will not go through. Dial the area code as an afterthought, and your call will get through to the wrong party. But it is possible to learn the number, dial it correctly, and completely transform your interactions with the people you can’t stand!
Unfortunately, there will always be a few difficult people who, no matter what you do, refuse to answer the phone and take your call. In those rare instances, you can switch metaphors and think of dealing with people you can’t stand as making a trip to the communication gym. Difficult people will help you work out your communication muscles and develop your communication stamina. In turn, this may be the very strength you’ll need, at some later time and place, to preserve a more valuable relationship.
We will direct your attention to five key areas for solving your people problems: